Harmony in the Holidays: Nurturing Family Well-being During a Busy Time of Year

Keep it simple for a low stimulation season.

The festive period in December can often feel like a LOT.

A lot of events.

A lot of presents.

A lot of noise.

A lot of colour.

A lot of traffic.

A lot of people.

A lot of money.

A lot of activities.

A lot of food.

A lot of pressure.

Even typing this I can feel a bit of weight in my chest. Deep breath.

If you’re feeling like things are adding up in lots of different ways - read on, you’re not alone. First, I’m gonna get a bit science-y on you.

Did you know that our senses perceive billions of sensory data points per second? BILLIONS. PER SECOND. Okay, so consciously this shrinks down to around 50 points per second, but still, we are receiving a lot of information every day.

Now, enter a season with lots of ‘extras’ and you’re kind of primed for sensory overload (especially for kiddos who lack fully formed brain structures that help regulate thalamic sensory processing!)

So what should you do? Here are some tips for focusing on a low stimulation holiday season.

Simplify. Avoid over scheduling and rushing around. This adds more expectations and stress. Better yet, schedule some ‘free time’ into your holidays. Make sure you have some days over the next month that you are not expected to be anywhere. Being intentional with our scheduling will help reduce the emotional load that comes with planning, travel, and prep. It will also give kids a chance to slow down and connect with each other and themselves.

Low light. Low volume. The days are at their shortest and it gets dark very early. Try avoiding tons of bright overhead lighting and opt for softer warmer periphery lights. Get some warm twinkly lights or faux candlelight to romanticize your time in the darkness. Same goes for music! Love your festive tunes? That’s great. Try turning the volume down or choosing slower instrumentals in the evening. Choosing these options offer less stimulation for your (and your family’s) nervous system.

Gratitude. Take time as a family to develop a gratitude practice. This is helpful because it requires us to do something really important: slow down. Invite your family (and yourself) to reflect on what you are thankful for. It really doesn’t matter what you come up with (it could be the soap that cleans our clothes!), but the more we invite our brain to consciously think about these things the better our overall mental health.

Make regulation part of the routine. Incorporate regulating activities into daily life. Regulation looks different for everyone so find what works for you and your family. It may be simple practices like breathing or moving your body!

Research suggests that yoga can offer a host of benefits for young people including emotional regulation.

Some of my favourite kid-friendly options are Yogapalooza and Cosmic Kids. My favourites for adults are The Underbelly and Yoga with Adriene.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself. It is okay if you get overwhelmed or overstimulated. One of the best things we can do for our family is to model how we deal with our feelings (not pretend we don’t have them!) Follow this scripting formula:

1. Identify what you are feeling in your body (this has to be genuine!)

2. Say it out loud

3. Share what you are going to do about it

“Yikes! There are so many things happening all at once and my body feels really hot. I need to go to a quiet space.”

“Wow I feel a big heavy weight on my chest. I think I need to focus on deep breathing. It helps if I put my hand on my chest too.”

Now, these are things you probably know or have heard before; but sometimes it just takes a refreshed recommitment to being intentional.

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Questions or feedback? Say hello at lisa@baycounselling.ca